It's not a summer sale event at Crappy Tire either.
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| Camp Caribou |
Going up the mountain nowadays could be a distraction on its own as a large number of tents have taken over the streets. You'd think with all of the people camping out, that they were waiting for a spectacular event, like a new video game console release, or a new iPhone. It's actually even better than that as needles and people that look like they're from the TV Series The Walking Dead are plaguing the area. The smell coming from these tents is also enough to make a skunk feel a little jealous.
One resident came up with an idea that Crappy Tire was having an event sale and someone decided to erect some tents to have a gathering. The only gathering though will be at City Hall this evening to find a solution to the homelessness, and why they choose this area. Police have also been "imported" to the area to disarray all of the tents. A police spokesperson thought about tying to attach pre-cooked Oscar Mayer hot dog wieners to a fishing line to lure some of the homeless from the tent. That way from around the corner, both the homeless person and the hot dog would be pepper sprayed. Sergeant Jackass said it's a type of fishing catch and release program. Catch the homeless and release them back to the tent to start all over again. A great use of tax payers money while intermediately going to the donut shop.
The city is also launching a program to teach the homeless basic etiquette. This includes teaching them how to put their underwear on correctly, and how to properly dispose of needles. The program runs Monday to Friday 1AM to 3AM at Gore Park when the average Joe isn't around, and only the neighborhood bicycle thief is on the prowl.
In other news. Crappy Tire stops selling tents after homeless person suffocated himself in a tent. CEO hopes to sell more BBQ's and kayak's.
