It's turmoil in the making. With mandates everywhere you go, to social distancing of 100 meters per person, truckers are fed up with the Liberal Government of Canuckstan, protesting their rights on Parmesan Hill.
Weeks have past since the first wave of protests started. Truckers are furious with government mandates of 100 push-ups before crossing the southern border. Those who fail the test will have to stay two weeks in quarantine only to be served Hamburger Helper on weekends.
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| If it's free for two weeks, why not? |
The country everyday is loosing millions of dollars in Monopoly Money, and Roll Up The Rim To Win is only available online now.
A tour of the convoy shows kids playing on the streets, people dancing and enjoying free food that good Samaritans have donated. The temperatures have reached -20 degrees, and nobody shows signs of backing down. Just a few polar bears returned back North.
The government however is painting another picture. They're calling the protesters extremists and terrible names. The government says that they don't need truckers, but that they still need their food.
We interviewed a few of the so called extremists this week, and this is what they had to say.
A trucker by the name of Fat Tony said "We just want to return back to a normal life. We're tired of having more needles in us than Sonic the Hedgehog. Even though I love Sonic The Hedgehog, enough is enough."
Another trucker by the name of Joey said the government is pushing people too far. He said earlier today he's not moving until the convoy gets a meeting with El Trudope and his Kitchen Cabinet Staff.
The convoy has sparked controversy because it's creating a blockade preventing people from reaching their nearest Timmies Drive Thru, especially the local Lazy Boy police. Most Kanadians, and the secret KGB unit need their morning coffee, and without it, they get the shakes. The shakes is only treated with very expensive medicine and is not covered by Ontariostan medical insurance.
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| Look at the blockade |
Police also got into the action by hitting people outside Parmesan Hill with crazy bread sticks, and spraying water cannons full of Kool-Aid. A patron decided to strip naked while the police dosed him with Kool-Aid. Members of the convoy commenting on FakeBook were visited by police handing out papers. No, they weren't free donut coupons, but stiff warnings about what you can say and do at protests. It said anyone caught doing the Macarena dance can be detained and arrested until the song is over.
But back to the real story here, where is Trudope, or better yet, where's Waldo? Is that really him in Parmesan Hill, or is it simply a hologram of him recorded from Kuba? Nobody will know. What other names will he call protesters to get his point across? When will he be kicked out of office and continue counting his sock collection from home? Those are all very good questions. We suppose only his caucus could answer that one.
Above are beautiful collectors editions T-Shirts, Mugs, Socks of various liberals and the very own Trudope himself. You can own one yourself by clicking on the photo.